Things Never Said
A collection of poems and songs I wrote to survive the storms. Words pulled from quiet nights, heavy days, and the spaces in between. This is where I keep the things that carried me when nothing else could.
Prescription for Goodbye
I wake up slow in a chemical haze
White pills, blue pills, take the edge off the days
Coffee’s cold, heart’s colder still
You ran off, and I’m swallowing the billYour ghost don’t knock, he kicks down the door
So I chase him out with what the doc gave me for
"Anxiety, depression, and unresolved grief"
Baby, that’s just page one of the pharmacy sheetI got ten kinds of meds just to sleep through the night
And a bottle of nitrous to make the numb feel right
You left with her, now I lie to survive
Dancing with demons just to feel alive
Yeah, love ain't a cure — it's a hell of a high
And I’m dosing up just to say goodbyeTV flickers, but the silence screams
I keep rewatching the death of my dreams
Your cologne's still on that old faded shirt
Can’t burn it yet, though I’d love to watch it hurtI tried prayer, I tried rage, even wrote you a song
But no melody fixes what you did so wrong
So now it’s SSRIs and faded tattoos
You left me with scars and a long list of "use"I got ten kinds of meds just to sleep through the night
And a bottle of nitrous to make the numb feel right
You left with her, now I lie to survive
Dancing with demons just to feel alive
Yeah, love ain't a cure — it's a hell of a high
And I’m dosing up just to say goodbyeThere’s a photo of us on a shelf that I don't touch
Next to the note that said, “I just don't love you that much”
She got your heart, I got the side effects
A heart full of holes and a mind to forgetNow it's twelve kinds of meds and a puff in the dark
A vape burning slow with a splintered spark
You chose her, I chose to survive
I’m still here, barely, but I’m alive
Love’s not a cure — but I gave it a try
Now I’m dosing up... just to say goodbye
Digital Forgetting
Neon lights in my bloodstream glow
Programmed peace, but it runs too slow
You left me bleeding in binary rain
Now I medicate just to reroute painI reboot my mind, erase your name
Every capsule a firewall from the shame
You’re skin-on-skin with someone new
While I download silence to get throughI’m on meds for the madness
Wired for the sadness
Codeine lullabies, screaming through static
You’re her addiction — I’m my own affliction
This ain’t healing — it’s digital forgettingYou ran off with her like I was a glitch
Left me crashing in a dopamine ditch
I pixelate where you used to touch
Synthetic calm — still hurts too muchI tried therapy, I tried prayer
Now it’s just pills and electric stares
You kissed goodbye with venom lips
Now I sip amnesia in tiny sipsI’m on meds for the madness
Wired for the sadness
Codeine lullabies, screaming through static
You’re her addiction — I’m my own affliction
This ain’t healing — it’s digital forgettingUnlove me slower
Let the circuits fry
Reboot the part
Where I believed your lie
You were the virus
I took the cure
Now I feel nothing
And I’m still not sureI’m on meds for the madness
Wired for the sadness
Love was the poison
Now I’m the mechanic
Erased your name with pharmaceutical fire
Burned the files — now I’m rewired
This ain’t healing —
This ain’t healing —
It’s digital… forgetting
Glass Thread
We walked on stars, or so I thought,
Laughed in the glow of battles fought.
But cracks would form, too sharp to see,
Each word a cut, each glance a plea.You said selfish, and I stood still—
Like I had climbed and broke the hill.
Third time’s the charm, or curse, or crime,
So I let go, walked out of time.Now we’re stitched in silence, fine and thin,
A thread of glass that bends within.
You smile again, but I still flinch—
One wrong word, and I’m off the brink.Maybe I’m too much to take,
Maybe you bend so I don’t break.
Maybe you think you’re sparing me—
But love like that comes painfully.I never asked to wear your blame,
But I still answer to the name.
And though we talk, it’s not the same—
I fear the fury beneath your flame.Now we’re stitched in silence, fine and thin,
A thread of glass that bends within.
You smile again, but I still flinch—
One wrong word, and I’m off the brink.So I tiptoe near, hold in my breath,
In this soft dance of quiet death.
Still wishing once you'd choose to stay,
Not punish me for being my way.
Thank You
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